When I decided to write an issue of Drunk Business Advice about balancing business with parenting, I reached out to some dear friends who I admire as both entrepreneurs and parents.

Here are some exact quotes from those conversations:

Soooo… I think I struck a nerve there. 😳

Also, this is a prime example of why non-parents probably shouldn’t attempt to give parenting advice. I didn’t even know the right questions to ask.

👉 Something’s gotta give. So when you’re forced into a tough decision, make it, move on, and don’t second-guess yourself.

👉 Go listen to this podcast. No questions. Just do it.

And now — the story behind why this advice matters. 👇

In my house, there was never any separation between work-life and home-life — it was all a mushy mess of moneymaking mayhem.

My family’s earliest business was a production company that installed entertainment on cruise ships:

Mom and dad wrote the shows together. Then mom would handle the creative stuff, like casting and directing, and dad would handle the business stuff, like production and contracts.

My parents converted our garage into a rehearsal studio, complete with wooden dance floors, mirrored walls, and audio equipment to get performers ready for the stages on the high seas.

Walking around the house, you would stumble on singers, dancers, and musicians in every square foot, and the company’s musical director actually lived with us (his bedroom was right next to mine).

And my favorite part? Our closets were treasure chests bursting with sparkly costumes.

Why did my folks do it this way? Why didn’t they lease a production office and rehearsal studios? Why did they bring all this chaos into a home with two small children?

Because in a family business, every penny spent on the business is a penny not spent on the family. They wanted to maximize their margins. And the best way to do this was to run the entire business out of our house — decades before the internet made at-home businesses a normal, boring occurrence.

Of course, we spent a fair amount of time on the cruise ships as well, but the business operations were handled from our house.

And my little brother and I were there for all of it.

I have vivid memories of sitting at the casting table during auditions, perusing headshots and commenting on who I thought was talented and who sucked — usually loud enough for the poor auditioners to hear (soooo sorry about that).

And I recall another time when the xerox machine smudged some lyrics on a copy of sheet music, forcing a new cast member to guess a line during a South Pacific musical tribute rehearsal. I walked over, gave him the correct line, and walked away baffled that these people didn’t know every word to every Rodgers & Hammerstein song ever written. I mean… who doesn’t? 😉

I recently asked my parents how they approached the decision to weave their young kids into their business so tightly. Their answer wasn’t surprising:

“We didn’t really think about it.”

There was no intention there — just survival. They needed to make money, and this was the best way they knew how to do that. And they had kids, so of course we were around for it all.

I think we turned out alright. 🤷

While I share entrepreneurship with my parents, I don’t actually share parenthood. So I interviewed 10 friends who are badass business owners and parents.

And as I mentioned earlier, I originally approached these conversations wanting to understand how they balance everything, so I could share those amazing secrets with all of you. But what emerged wasn’t balance — it was a shit-ton of collisions:

The moments that mattered most to their business, and the moments that mattered most to their family, had a strange habit of arriving at the same damn time.

So something’s gotta give.

And no one has the luxury of planning these decisions. They’re made in the moment. Some days the business will “win” in the moment, other days the family will “win”. 

But the best thing you can do when a collision occurs is just make the decision and move forward without endlessly second-guessing it. Because trying to hold both roles in perfect equilibrium is utterly unrealistic.

Most of the friends I spoke with have rockstar spouses who anchor the family during times when their business is blowing up. But when my friend Michael Jacobs went through a divorce, he suddenly became a single dad — and he still had to run his manufacturing company.

Yikes.

He surrounded himself with other parents for support, but realized they weren’t addressing the shit that really mattered:

Now that his kids are older (and he’s happily re-married), Michael has taken a step back to reflect on that nutty time. He decided to do what any motivated entrepreneur would do when examining a big question:

Start a podcast. 🎙️

Duh.

Michael’s guests on Gap to Gig Podcast have included mental health professionals, entrepreneurs, and career coaches — but also some truly legendary high-achievers, like an Olympic high-jumper and a former fighter jet pilot.

And while he mainly focuses on fatherhood, moms and even non-parents (like me) have been listening in droves. Because this shit is universal.

We’re all seeking balance, but life is really about just managing collisions. That’s the essence of Drunk Business Advice.

So let this serve as your reminder to stop trying to be everything to everyone, and start enjoying the buzz. 🍺

Cheers!

-Kristin

P.S. — HUGE thanks to my incredible friends who took time to share their parenting woes with me. Y’all are legends:

And of course… Michael Jacobs. Go listen to Gap to Gig. It’s f*cking rad.